Laura Nikolich & Konrad Amrhein – How to be a Mermaid

I haven’t talked to you in months.
Lockdown became an era.

You sit on your ass a lot lately, parts of your body start to forget what it feels like to move, to be moved. It might be your ribcage, your hips, your knees, your neck, your joints, your head-

Here’s what I want you to do: read the text, try to face whatever comes up, do the things it asks you to do and then, after you’re done, listen to the improvisation. Trust me.

How to be a Mermaid

More coffee more showers
I pee coffee I cry under water
No leftover ketamine in my fridge
I’m tired of shopping
My knees don’t open anymore
How to be a mermaid

My legs don’t open anymore
No walking
No moving

How to be a mermaid 🧜‍♀️

Whose water is it
The world owes me
For sure

Bring me safe to shore

Is it too late to call
My legs don’t open anymore
I don’t remember you between my knees

Fish and chips
Sunscreen skin cancer
Saltwater breeze

How to be a mermaid
My legs don’t open anymore

And in a zoom meeting they can’t tell that I’m fish from my waist down

I always loved the color blue
Call old friends
How to be a mermaid

Sushi and Netflix
Loneliness is a drought

Is it too late to call
An old friend
How to be a mermaid

I can’t understand you under water
Here’s how;

Go to your nearest window

Fish behind glass
Open it
Try to cry
Nothing but water running
Hold your breath

Breathe through your cheeks
Air is toxic for now, filter is key

Bend over, loosen your neck, bend over more

Stay like this, you have nowhere to go, no one is waiting for you

Come up again, do you see stars? Your circulation is probably messed up
Are you dizzy?

Relocate your eyes towards your temples
Bite the part between your thumb and your index finger
Webbing
Interdigital folds
Syndactyly
Names for the skin between your fingers
Words to let you know
You once were fish

Now go to your sink
Turn on the tap on
Try to swim
I dare you

How to be a mermaid
Leave the water running
Look out the window
Sea

How to be a mermaid
And the knees you once opened with your palms
I now have to disjoin myself

How to be a mermaid
Evolution my dear is a slow process
We’re not dead
We’re just under water for now